Remembering Marlon (A Journal of God's Power to Mend Relationships)

This month of August is a very sentimental month for me as everything happened last year has turned my world upside down.

Below is a journal I made about Marlon's battle. I am dedicating this to our daughter Marsie so that when she grew up she will remember how brave her dad was.

July 4, 2010

I attended the Star Wars Sports Fest Opening 2009 of Stellar Global Solutions Philippines. I participated the Pump It Up dance contest to represent the Blue Team Pegasus. We won! I really enjoyed the Dance Revolution arcade with Randy, Ole, CM, etc. I also tried wall climbing with Joyce and Amy. Marsie, Mammoth and Daye were supposed to be with me at the opening unfortunately, Marlon was very sick by then and I have to cut my time with my friends. My office mates Garo, Randy and Roma gave me their food stamps for Marsie. It was fun and we had picture taking with TM Nes, Mae, Andie, Sam and TM Nes' son. While having fun, I've been receiving text messages from Marlon that he's asking to me go home before lunch time. I just maximized my time with my friends and had a little talk with Apple about Marlon's condition. She comforted me and I cried on her shoulders because I knew that when I get back home in Marikina, I would be facing a more serious problem.

As I arrived in Marikina I just rested for a while and talked with my husband. I know he's in pain so I kept on hugging him and re-assuring him that I will be with him no matter what.

Ate Mimi accompanied us at Amang Rodriguez Medical Center in Marikina. She paid for all laboratory tests.

July 6, 2009

Accompanied dadi Marlon at the hospital for his CT Scan at Amang Rodriguez. I contacted Ptr. Roland Ramos to ask help as to where to seek financial assistance. He introduced Sis. Glo Fajarda who works at Amang.

July 9, 2009

I went to Amang and and looked for Sis. Glo Fajarda at the Accounting Department. She's a member of Soul RX of Bread of Life Marikina. She assisted me on how to seek financial aid through Social Welfare Association.

July 11, 2009

Marlon woke up early around 3am to meet me at KFC Cubao near Stellar because we're going to East Avenue Medical Center for his Colonoscopy appointment with Dr. Ronald Umipig at 5am. Thank God at this time TL Aris was able to help me file for VTO. I could still vividly remember what happened. I saw him at a distant while I was walking toward KFC. I wanted to cry. Seeing him in pain makes me feel sad. I hate to see him that way because I'm used to seeing him as a jolly person with a light-heart spirit. We were then waiting for a cab across the street near Gateway. Suddenly, Roma and Ann called my attention. They saw me and Marlon and bade us goodbye hoping for a good result.

We arrived at East Avenue Medical Center at 4:30am but the doctor arrived at 6am. Just imagine how Marlon felt that day. He was on protocol to fast. He hasn't eaten anything yet and his fasting was prolonged. When Doctor Ronald Umipig arrived, he said that his assistant will not be available so he asked me to give him a hand. He handed me a pair of surgical gloves that I need to pay at the cashier.

Marlon was holding my left hand all throughout the process while my right hand was holding on the colonoscopy apparatus, I don't know how it is called. That thing is squirting feces of Marlon. It is pressurized and this is where the doctor used to control the colonoscopy camera as it entered into Marlon's tummy through his anus. I could see Marlon's face in distress and his hand tightly grasping mine. I could hear him cry in pain as the apparatus was slowly penetrating his intestines. Looking at the tv monitor, I could see blood gushing out from intestinal walls. There were mass of white color and some are blackish. The doctor confirmed that he's at stage 3. So he asked my permission to get a tissue for Histopath. We both agreed and the doctor performed a biopsy extraction.

July 16, 2009

Marlon's day 1 of confinement at the hospital. His hemoglobin count dropped to 6.3 versus the normal rate of 12.5 (very low). He needed blood transfusion for about 4 bags. That is equivalent to 8 donors. Though Marlon was confined, I still need to go to work. It was Mang Pekto who would accompany Marlon at the hospital while I'm away for work.

July 17, 2009

I brought up my concerns to my team leader Aris that Marlon needs blood transfusion and he was kind enough to bring the matter up to the whole Australasia Bay. Ate Mimi went to Amang together with 2 nurse attendants (George and the other guy, I forgot the name) to donate blood for Marlon. George is the closest friend of Marlon at Divine Mercy Psychiatric Institution. He was the only person whom Marlon trusted and he called him "tatay George". He is also the one who knew that he has a very serious illness that Marlon kept it from me as he don't want me to worry about him.

Randy Amora arrived at Amang. I was touched that he donated blood for Marlon. Randy is my wave mate at stellar and was my team mate too in Palau. He is one of my closest friends at work. Marlon was losing weight. His looks changed but his spirit is still intact. A jolly person with a good fighting spirit. I am happy to see Marlon that way. We were both fighting this battle TWO-gether.

July 18, 2009

Dadi Marlon received his first blood transfusion. He consumed 2 bags. I hate the nurse who attended Marlon. Marlon was supposed to be injected with vials of Vit. K in 3 intervals. The first interval was a panic to us. The nurse injected the first vial. Right after that in just a matter of 10 seconds, Marlon had a seizure and he had a mental block. Thank God there was somebody beside him another patient who helped him get up. I rushed to see dadi. He was pale and stiff. He can't talk and had a blank face as if he did not recognized me. I rushed to the nurse station and reported the incident. When I got back, Marlon was ok and he told me right after Vit K was injected he felt the numbness all over his body. That nurse walked out didn't showed up.

Marlon asked me to accompany him at the comfort room. I held his IV and BT (blood transfusion). As he stood up, blood gushed out from the bag. The syringe was detached from the main plug. That silly nurse's fault again. She failed to put the Micropor tape to secure the syringe. The floor was all blood. My hand was bloody red. I was in a panic mode. I don't know what to do. I have the IV and BT on my hands and I can't reach the syringe to stop the blood. I just needed to think fast and act fast. At last my brain functioned to react to the situation. I hang the IV and BT to the pole and grabbed the syringe as fast as I could. The blood stopped but I don't know if I should put it back on the plug, or should I clean it first. But I'm bloody red and can't grab anything to clean the mess. I just put back the syringe on the plug and asked Marlon to limit his movements. I cleaned myself, grabbed an alcohol and some cotton to sanitize the BT plug. I put the micropor around the plug to ensure that the syringe will not fall off again. I am very disappointed, that no one from the nurse station dared to help me. Just the neighboring patients stood up and helped us.

What do I expect? Amang Rodriguez is a public hospital. They are under-staffed and the atmosphere is not patient-friendly. I am not expecting anymore. If they would be nice THANK GOD. If not, it is theirs to think about it not mine. Their profession is to TAKE CARE patients and not to abandon them. It is for them to draw the line between PROFESSION and being STRESSED OUT. Work is work irregardless of what you feel. It is not an excuse to blame at the hospital's lack of equipment, lack of nurses, lack of doctors, etc.

July 19, 2009

TM Marie Faberes came to donate blood for Marlon (Type O). She is not my TM but we've been talking since I was selling Herbalife at the Pantry last 2008.

July 20, 2009

Jigger Antido (my best friend) came over to donate blood for Marlon.

July 21, 2009

Bryan from Team Kiribati came to donate blood for Marlon. Aww... so touching. Thank you so much Bryan. He's not my team mate but a close friend in the office. Papa Boy bought Marlon's 8th bag from the Blood Bank of Amang.

Doctor Salvani said that Marlon needs to eat more eggs and taho everyday to increase his protein and albumin count. This is essential for him in preparation for his surgery. Marlon needs several laboratory tests for clearance to see if he is capable of coping up with the surgery. The doctors need to see if his blood count is already at its normal level.

Doctor Salvani gave Marlon some free samples of protein milk to help him recover fast. Marlon was very happy to see his doctor. He said that he has a crush on doctor Salvani. I am happy for him as he joked and looked at me saying "SELOS KA NAMAN".

Ate Mimi came at Amang late in the afternoon. She told me that I should ask the doctors to stop the lab tests because she has no money to spend for it. Upon hearing that, my brain wants to explode and try to understand what she meant over and over again. Did I hear her correctly that she wants to get rid all of the lab tests to save her pocket? Didn't she realized that Marlon needs the lab tests all the more to make sure that he is able to LIVE after surgery? Didn't she want Marlon to have a successful surgery? Those were the questions kept lingering on my head at that time. Forgive me but that was me. I am not the type of person who would summon someone for a fight. I usually summon my brain and FIGHT my subconscious mind and try to bring back my composure as I can. For I believe it is far better to be "HUMANE" than being "HUMAN".

July 24, 2009

Marlon and I prayed last night. It was my day off yesterday so Pekto went home with his family. At this time, Marlon's color improved because of the good response from the blood transfusion and from his strict eggs/taho diet. Marlon was taking Herbalife too as his food supplement.

Marlon is becoming a prayerful man. He's learning to verbalize that God is taking in control of everything. And that he's got the strength now that he never have had before.

July 26, 2009

Marlon texted me while I was washing my clothes at Amy's house. He said that he needs 2 more BT's (blood transfusion). I can't help it but cry. This time I let my tears fall down because Marlon was not around. I don't want Marlon to see me crying as I don't want to affect his STRENGTH. It's going to be hard again for Marlon. BT usually lasts 4 hours. He will have to bear these 4 hours sitting as he's not allowed to sleep while on a BT. He preferred to sit so that there will be no problems in the BT process. He's getting rid of the clogging, backflowing and frequent visits to the comfort room. As much as possible he would not eat nor drink in 4 hours while BT is being performed. He is limiting his movements so that the line to his veins is still good to go.

Prior to this, yesterday I was very happy at the office. I talked to TL Nesty and updated him about Marlon's conditions. I also talked with TL Aris (my immediate supervisor) about my QA monitoring made by Ginno. I filed a dispute and Aris supported me. I was very happy also that my team Palau was showing their support for Marlon.

I need to be strong for my husband so that his PEACE and STRENGTH will remain in him and his prayerful heart should stay in his spirit.

TL Aris also allowed me to rest/sleep at the clinic for 3 hours. Oh, I appreciated it so much. Thank you TL Aris. Amy was very hospitable and accommodating to "all" my needs. In return, I patronized her merchandise. I bought some shorts and shirts for Marlon. Amy gave me a big discount and Robert (Amy's husband) gave Marlon some FREE shorts. Amy also gave me some of her old clothes.

July 27, 2009

This is the day that the Lord has made. I will rejoice and be glad in it.

Thank you Lord for being so faithful to us. Thank you Lord for FRIENDS who helped and supported us: mami Ruby, Roma, Amy, TL Nesty, TL Julius, TL Aris, TL Mari, OM Edz, Ice, Ayanne, Jigz, Obet, Randy, Berns, Gamma, Mavic, Apple, Bryan, Ann, etc.

This is the day that Marlon and I prayed together. And the Lord dealt us to fix our relationship first and foremost with the LORD and every relationships we've had will be fixed as well: spouse, children, parents, siblings, relatives, in-laws, friends, superiors, subordinates, strangers, co-workers, neighbors, countrymen and ENEMIES.

July 31, 2009

Marlon asked me to go home to check on Marsie and to ask for prayer requests from our JIA church mates. I was able to talked with Sis. Ruby and Bro. Alex. They assured me that their prayers will go with Marlon. Songs that struck me during the Praise and Worship was Eagle's Wings and His Eye is on the Sparrow.

I stayed overnight at Junix' place with Marsie. I attended Sunday Service at JIA. I finished the whole service in spite of Marlon's plea not to finish it so that I could go back to him asap with mama.

After the service Marsie and Jasmine went with me at Walter Mart to buy some toys and their baon for school. We bought a toy for Sarah too. Tita Ann and Tito Jerson went to Bulacan. Tita Ann is 5 months pregnant. We just had some few chit chats then mama and I have to rush in going to Manila. Marsie was clueless about his dad's situation.

Mama and I arrived Amang at 5:30pm. Papa Boy, Ate Mimi, Daye and Mang Mar were there. I had a spiritual encounter today with the Lord to fix broken relationships so God helped me mend my ill-feelings towards my in-laws. Had a chance to have a heart to heart talk with ate Mimi and I was able to show her the importance of spirituality in our lives. I invited her over to attend fellowships. She didn't say yes or no. She was just silent - but I would take it as a good sign to patch things up between us.

She asked for understanding if papa Boy has committed any shortcomings. She cried when I told her that Marlon's condition is at the worst scenario. And I shared with her that in spite of that Marlon and I still have this FAITH and believed that God is going to do MORE to fulfill HIS greater PLAN for ALL of us.

Then I uttered a prayer in my heart...

"Lord I pray, please use Marlon and I mightily to show forth your GLORY. Use every part of us, our body, soul and spirit to mend relationships and to save souls. Lord, we claim for HEALING, MIRACLES, SALVATION and SPIRITUAL BREAKTHROUGHS in the lives of every people around us (papa Boy, ate Mimi, kuya Ned, Agnes, Jenny, Daye, Mammoth, friends, relatives, etc). Use our life to display your power, glory, mercy, grace, love and greatness. AMEN."

August 2, 2009

Mama went with me in going back to Marikina as Marlon will be scheduled for surgery any time tomorrow. Marlon requested to have mama beside him right after his surgery. Marlon was very understanding that as much as I wanted to be with him after his surgery but I can't because I have to go to work. It was so touching because he requested my mom to be with him right after his surgery and "not" his dad nor his sister.

August 3, 2009

Sister Ronette Tan texted me and said that she still have the spare blood of her deceased mom and that she's going to donate it for Marlon. So I went to their house to get the blood bank request form from Bro. Tin at Pagataan. He gave me P1,000 for Marlon's needs.

While I was looking after Marlon's BT, papa Boy and ate Mimi has to buy the required stent for Marlon's surgery at Kidney Institute as Doctor Salvani instructed. There was no available stent at Kidney Institute. They were able to buy one at St. Luke's which is far more expensive than the one at Kidney Institute.

I went to Chinese General to get the blood needed for Marlon's backup BT while he's at the operating room. I bought a cooler and some ice to preserve the blood. But Chinese General Hospital will not release the blood until the request was signed by Doctor Salvani or any attending physician of Marlon. So I went back to Amang and waited for Salvani to sign the Blood Transfusion Request form. I rushed back to Chinese General Hospital to claim the blood and paid P3,140. I used the money that is supposed to be for our home amortization.

I took a cab in going back to Amang. I brought the blood at the Blood Bank of Amang Hospital immediately. I went to Male Surgery Ward to see Marlon's condition. He was ok. Mama was taking good care of him. Mama and Marlon prayed most of the time.

August 4, 2009

Marlon undergone his surgery. The doctors opened his tummy but didn't remove the mass (too numerous to remove and it spread to his urinary bladder). They put colostomy on his side and has NGT and catheter.

I was beside him when he went out of the recovery room. He saw me and showed me a thumbs up sign. I could hardly compose myself and I feel like crying. But seeing him smiling with a thumbs up, I have to hold back my tears. I embraced him, held his hands and uttered a thank you prayer to Jesus. He's not allowed to talk so I whispered to him that he should rest and I will take good care of him.

He didn't know that it was just an open and close surgery and that he has colostomy bag on his tummy. I don't know how to tell him about it without breaking his good spirit to fight his cancer. So, I just prayed and asked God for wisdom.

While he was sleeping, the doctor told me that I should learn how to change his colostomy bag. OMG! I just can't stand looking at how the nurse cleaned his colostomy. Blood gushing out and messed up his bed. Dadi was clueless as he was not feeling any pain while blood is gushing out from his tummy. Mama can't stand it and turned back.

I have to buy more colostomy bag as it is going to be his daily routine until he gets better. Colostomy bag is too expensive. Thinking about the cost plus his medicines and his food, oh my, I don't know where to find money to sustain his needs.

August 5, 2009

It's just now that everything gets into my nerve that Marlon is at Stage 3. I broke done at the office and many times I was not doing well at work. Going to work is my outlet to burst and be myself that I am WEAK and VULNERABLE. But I have to be okay for my husband and for my daughter. I have to remind myself that I am Marlon's PARTNER in this battlefield. And I am Marsie's mom to be her GUIDE.

August 6, 2009

I missed Marsie so much. Moreso, dadi Marlon missed his princess. I am too careful not to mention Marsie's name so that dadi will not feel bad.

Marlon's funds are totally drained. I cried for help once again, "Lord, may you provide our needs as you are my Jehovah Jireh."

I already went to St. Luke's to refund for the stent that was not used for Marlon's surgery. Was able to refund the amount of P2,087.87. Marlon is consuming P1,490 everyday.

August 7, 2009

A very prayerful day wherever I go...

"Lord, I knew that it's too late for me to realize that Marlon should have not undergone surgery as Ptr Alex said. But I know that there's a reason why it happened. Why papa Boy and ate Mimi keeps on insisting to have his surgery done asap. I would cling on to to you all the more because you are the "all-knowing" God. I love Marlon so much and I want him to be back with a different body that is full of miracles, love, mercy and grace. Nowadays, I want to believe that you are going to heal Marlon totally."

August 8, 2009

It's my day off. I would take care of him 24 hours today. I changed his colostomy, changed his soiled brief and shorts. I can't believe that I'm able to learn it fast. I used to "live" at the hospital already with Marlon. Right after work, I went straight to Amang to sleep a bit then wake up to attend to Marlon's needs. I used to take a bath at the children's ward comfort room at the ground floor. I used to buy our food at the hospital's cafetorium at the ground floor.

Today is his first day to eat malunggay soup with tilapia cooked by papa Boy for him. He's always asking me to pray for him several times. Before I go to work and several times during my day off. Our prayer is for his healing. Healing from his cancer and healing from broken relationships that we've had. The purpose is to save souls and to show God's glory to people around us.

During his afternoon nap he was in excruciating pain due to he's not able to digest well yet. He ate a lot during lunch time.

August 9, 2009

Again, Marlon was in excruciating pain when he ate a lot when papa cooked him nilagang baka. He was in pain for 30 minutes around 8:00pm to 8:30pm. He couldn't sleep.

This afternoon, Doc Salvani and Doc Batungbakal told us that we can go home tomorrow. And this was the day when TL Aris called me up telling me that I was tagged NCNS which I was clueless about because I knew it was my off.

August 10, 2009

Marlon's bill was P21,687. It was discounted to P8000 as I was able to seek financial assistance from SWA. Still I can't afford such an amount plus the fact Mimi and Papa didn't gave me any single penny to pay for the hospital. I went to the office of Congressman Marcy and they gave me P1500 and another P2000 from Senator Enrile. So it leaves to an amount of P4,500. Still I can't afford it because I only have P3500. I went to SWA again to seek if there's another way to get it lowered. They instructed me to go to the accounting department and check if Mayor Marides has got something to give. Thank God, the hospital gave P1500 and the balance was lowered to P3000.

I called ate Mimi and told her about it. She wants to get it lowered. She called me to go to Kagawad Enard and tell him that I was being referred to by Kagawad Gil Navarro. But Kagawad Enard was not around and didn't get any financial assistance in the end. So, I just acted upon it. I paid at the cashier worth P3000 before it gets closed. Marlon has one bag left at the blood bank. There was a woman who approached me if Marlon has a spare blood. She needs it for her daughter. I told her that we have one more bag left. She said she wants to buy it for P1000 because that's all she got. I agreed even if I paid it for P3,140 (my sweat and blood from my own pocket). So we went to Blood Bank to fix the transfer of ownership. That was the blood I bought at Chinese General Hospital that Marlon is supposed to use while he's at the operating room.

Today is a very tiresome day and yet I have to go on and on and on...

Marlon got a high fever while I was busy fixing his hospital bills. First, he chilled then he's fever rose up to 39 degrees Celsius. Sis. Babylita helped me. She gave us hot compress to ease Marlon's chilling and bought Biogesic for Marlon. Sis. Babylita is the woman who approached me who bought Marlon's blood for P750. She was supposed to pay me P1000 but because of her kindness and I know she has more challenges to face I only asked for P70 instead.

I called ate Mimi and she told me to go to Kagawad Gil for additional help. But Marlon was still chilling. I can't leave him anymore. I took care of him and pay much attention to his fever for 2 hours. I administered cold compress until his fever subsided. I took heed ate Mimi's suggestion to go to Kagawad Gil. Unfortunately, they gave nothing. Kagawad Gild is a friend of ate Mimi. I asked Mimi if papa can bring some money for Marlon's discharge. She said we have to wait until tomorrow, but Marlon is longing to go home.

When Marlon was chilling and having a high fever, it was only me and Sis. Babylita who helped him. I went to the nurse station several times asking for assistance but they kept on saying "one moment please". Damn phrase "one moment please" for a nurse to tell that to his dying/sick patients! When they came, it was too late. His fever already subsided.

Papa Boy called kuya Jun to drive Marlon back home with his jeep. Marlon was too tired and messy too. He ran out of colostomy bag. I asked ate Mimi some money to buy is colostomy bag. They all wanted to have Marlon's colostomy cleaned up because it's getting smelly already. Since there's no colostomy bag. I am improvising some ways to drain his soiled colostomy bag. I've been punching holes to drain it and put some micropor around the opening to close it. It's getting messier as they say how I improvised.

At last, papap Boy volunteered to buy the colostomy. Unfortunately, he was not able to buy one. I have instructed him that it can only be bought at the Mercury or Marikina Valley Hospital. Papa Boy only tried Mercury and bought nothing. So I rushed to Marikina Valley to buy a good quality Colostomy Bag. I left Marlon for a moment, securing his soiled bag first before I left.

When I came back, I replaced his colostomy bag. No more spills, no more foul odor, and he can move freely.

At the middle of the night while we were sleeping, he chilled again and his fever rose to 39 degrees Celsius. I rushed to ate Mimi and asked for medicines. I administered hot and cold compress.

Marlon was too weak yet to handle his own colostomy drain. So, I called TL Aris that I won't be able to go to work so that they will not tag me as NCNS.

August 11, 2009

Thank God it's my day off. I was able to look after Marlon again for 24 hours. I was able to give him immediate care when his fever attacked him once again. He lose bowel through his anus with blood. We didn't expect it because we thought that he's bowel will no longer pass through his anus but through his colostomy. He was eating his breakfast when a foul smell annoyed ate Mimi and Jenoy. I saw him he was wet with his bloody bowel. I cleaned him up. His papa Boy went out of the house and can't stand the smell it created at the dining table. Jenoy their househelp stepped out of the house too... vomiting.

I changed Marlon's clothes and brief. I secured him first, made him comfortable and let him sleep while I washed his soiled clothes. I cleaned up his mess at the dining table and scrubbed the floor where it got some stain. After the chores, I went back to his room and checked on his condition. He's got fever again.

I was worried about his situation so I asked Jenoy to reload my cellphone. I would have to call Doctor Batungbakal for some advice. Doctor said that due to his condition it is but normal to have fever once in a while. And this bowel movement is normal because they didn't closed his anus. He said that he's slowly recuperating but his immune system was very low. Doctor advised that he needs to eat well to recover.

August 12, 2009

It's my day off. Marlon's waper needs to be replaced. It's worth P400+ at the Marikina Valley Hospital. I used my own money to buy 2 wapers and 2 clamps.

Maribel, Marlon's cousin called him up on the phone. While he was talking with Maribel he was very enthusiastic but he was chilling again while talking on the phone. He did not tell Maribel about it. He just sounded ok and asked Maribel that he needs to rest and thanked her for the call. I grabbed his hand to help him walk to his room to have some rest. Marlon and I prayed all the more. He asked God to take away his fever so that he may get well soon. He cried and praised God when his fever subsided after 2 hours. He called is dad and thanked him for their financial support.

Now, we ran out of his milk, juices for protein and fiber (his daily requirement). We just let GO and LET GOD. We prayed together... We praised and worshiped God together... and we were TWO-gether.

Marlon loose some bloody bowel again. This time he didn't soiled his pants. He was able to manage to go to the bathroom. He shaved his goaty and now he looked better than yesterday.

During the night, he's complaining that he can't sleep. He was too sleepy but he can't go to sleep. It's because he was losing blood and has anemia. Thank God ate Mimi bought him iron tablets for his blood. He's unusually awake between the hours of 11pm to 3am.

August 13, 2009

Marlon woke up at 8am. Thank God he was able to sleep that long. I bought him coco crunch cereal for his breakfast. He finished his milk and his taho.

August 14, 2009

Mama brought Marsie to Marikina. Mama stayed overnight and she went back to Bulacan the following day. I explained to Marsie about her dad's situation. I told her that dadi has a wound on his tummy so she has to be very careful when she would hug her dad. She has to hug her dad gently. I told her that her dad is moving bowel through his tummy. Marsie can hardly believe me so I showed her dadi's colostomy. My fault, because Marsie was shocked and didn't want to go near her dad anymore. She kept on crying. So before I left for work, I explained to her again that it was just temporary.

August 15, 2009

When I came home from work, Marsie was able to get over her fear. She's drawing near her dad already and looking at us on how I cleaned his dad's colostomy.

We celebrated Marsie's 6th birthday in advanced. Marsie's visitors were Amy with her family, Apple and Joyce. I bought a cake, softdrinks, shanghai and pancit. Amy brought Crispy Ulo which Marlon ate.

August 16, 2009

I brought Marsie back to Bulacan for her school. Then I have to go back to work.

August 17, 2009

Kuya Myk called me up and encouraged me and Marlon to consider Doctor Navarro (a wellness doctor who specializes in cancer cases).

August 18, 2009

I went to Pag-ibig to pay the August monthly amortization with 13 days penalty. Today is my day off.

August 19, 2009

I have my shift and Marlon is having a fever again. I instructed him to take Biogesic round the clock every 4 hours while I'm at work. This time I missed Marsie so much. Me and Marlon have lost so many time with Marsie. Lord, help us manage a quality time with Marsie.

August 20, 2009

I went to doctor Navarro's clinic as instructed by kuya Myk. Doc Des gave me some lecture on Natural Food for Marlon and the Balancing Diet to combat cancer.

On my way home I saw Doc Estrellita Te getting off the MRT at Shaw Station. We talked and told her about Marlon's situation. She recalled that Levy has a colon cancer too before and now she has survived cancer 100%. Levy was at stage 3B then. And Marlon is at Stage 3.

Doc Des tole me that Marlon has a big chance to get better. Marlon accepted the treatment although he just disliked the enema routine which has to be administered daily. He wanted his colostomy out.

Tomorrow, I will go to Amang and ask Doc Salvani as to when his colostomy be taken out. Marlon and I kept on praying for his total healing.

September 1, 2009

Today is Marsie's actual birthday. I called Junix if we could greet Marsie a happy birthday. Unfortunately, Marsie didn't dropped by at Junix' house. I went to Doc Navarro's clinic and it was Doc Des who accommodated me. I bought the Balancing for Marlon worth P6350 that would last for 2weeks. Ate Mimi shared P2000, papa Boy shared P2000 and the rest are from me.

I bought bulalo, honey, dalandan, fish, etc for Marlon. To help Marlon recover fast, I have to give him all natural food. I have to change also my diet and pattern it to Marlon's diet to encourage him all the more.

September 2, 2009

Right after my shift I was asked by Amy if I could visit her dying mom at Heart Center. I took time to visit her mom even though Marlon is also sick. I was able to talk to her mom and prayed for her. Prayer for her salvation and have invited Jesus to take control of her being. Then I rushed going back home in Marikina.

Marlon started taking his Balancing. In the morning before breakfast on an empty stomach he needs to do the following:

* take 1 glass of distilled water mixed with half teaspoon of agua oxinada (food grade 10%)

* administer 1 liter enema of distilled water mixed with 1 tbsp agua oxinada

After breakfast, he has to take his Balancing Medicines with Carabao's Milk, Carrot Juice, etc. And during the night after dinner he has to take balancing meds again.

September 3, 2009

Marlon's responses to Balancing was very good. He's got a good sleep, good energy, good bowel movement, no pain, no more fever, no allergic reactions.

September 5, 2009

Marlon was in pain due to detox effect of the balancing. He's experiencing pain on his back, around the colostomy bag, stomach, upper stomach. But all these pains are tolerable compared to his pains before. Thank God today is my day off. I am able to monitor Marlon round the clock today. Marlon's stoma was inflamed. It grew so big as my arm 7 inches long. I was too worried about this. When I asked him if he's in pain he said that the pain was tolerable and that it changes directions of the pain.

I made carrot juice out of the 1 kilo of fresh carrots I bought from the market. Marlon's carrot juice was mixed with kinchay and celery. Ate Melinda lend me her juicer.

I receive a text message from Amy that her mom just passed away.

September 6, 2009

Marlon's stoma is still inflamed. We prayed so hard to help Marlon. We claimed that God is the Great Physician. We entrust everything into God's hands.

September 10, 2009

2nd Year Anniversary of Stellar. Francis J. Kong was invited to talk about Excellence. I asked for an autograph. I used Marlon's Colostomy Bag seal to have FJK's signature.

September 12, 2009

Finally Marlon and I went home to Bulacan by the grace and mercy of God. I thought we're not going to be home yet because ate Mimi told us that we can't go home yet. For what reason? She said we don't have a vehicle to bring us back home But Marlon was very persistent. He said he wants to be home to see Marsie performed on stage with her Declamation. He talked to kuya Jun Pineda if he could drive us back home in Bulacan. I just took a short nap then we headed homeward bound. It was raining cats and dogs but it didn't hinder us in going back home. Papa Boy accompanied us.

I don't have funds to sustain our needs in Bulacan. I don't know how are we going to survive. Thank God His ways are higher than our ways and His thoughts are higher than our thoughts - that I can't comprehend His goodness, mercy and love.

Ate Mimi gave Marlon a start up capital of P5,000 to have a sari sari store in Bulacan. Lord, give us wisdom on how to be a good steward of these blessings. Thank you Lord. Ate Mimi gave an additional P2,000 for Marlon's Balancing and papa boy gave P2000 as well.

On our way home, we encountered a collision along CP Garcia. We were hit by a Trooper because kuya Jun halted when there was a deep opening on the road. As a result, a truck hit the Trooper that collided to our vehicle. The process delayed our going home. Thank God I was able to bring some food for Marlon and some water. I took pictures of the damaged as Marlon can't get off the jeep. He wanted to see how bad we were hit. I showed him the pictures that we were not badly hit. It was the Trooper that has multiple cracks and damages. We were saved by God. No matter what happened still God has kept us safe and no one was wounded. We stopped by at Camp Karingal for 2 hours to settle the damage

We bought bangus at Anyhaw for lunch. Marlon was very happy to be home. Marsie was very excited to see us back.

Marlon's pain attacked again. We just prayed and asked God to touch his PAIN. Then Dadi was able to take his balancing.

Nanay Ising came over to visit Marlon. Dadi was very happy to see our friendly neighbor Nanay Ising. He testified that it was only through PRAYERS that he's getting better everyday.

September 13, 2009

Marlon was showing signs of improvements. Thus, I made use of the time to venture into Load Extreme business to augment our income. I also attended DLC seminar and signed up for P300.

October 19, 2009

Marlon and I celebrated our 8th year wedding anniversary. I cooked Bulalo for Dadi which he loved so much. He was getting better and was able to clean up his colostomy by himself. His sari sari store gained profit. He was frequently doing his morning routine to exercise by walking outside. He was able to do his routine to buy morning newspapers on our neighborhood and visited his cousin Third who lives down some few blocks away from our house. He's no longer in pain and no longer showing fever for quite some time.

We were able to go malling and he knows already how to manage his colostomy drain when were at Walter Mart. We have to bring his paraphernalia: alcohol, cotton and tissue paper.

We bought a wedding ring. He was the one who chose the design. We both have the same size. We bought it at Silver Works Walter Mart Sta. Maria. An engraved ring of our name and date of our wedding. On my ring it has LON 101901 and on his ring SUZI 101901

We were both happy and he ate his favorite Shawarma Rice at Walter Mart Food Court. He was full of hope. His energy level was good.

Today is also Papa Boy's Birthday. He called papa Boy on the cell phone and greeted him happy birthday.

October 22, 2009

Marlon thought of his dad most of the time. He wanted to visit his dad, so we went to Marikina. We were able to visit the Tiangge at the Riverbanks. Marlon at shawarma. He was ok and very happy seeing his family. I made sure that all his Balancing meds were taken on time and that his eating all natural foods.

We can't stay long in Marikina as Marsie has to go to school. I asked Marlon if he wants to stay but he insisted to go back home with us in Bulacan.

Marlon boast of our wedding ring to ate Mimi and Papa Boy. He was very happy and looking forward to his fast recovery.

October 31, 2009

Marlon remembered his deceased mom and brother. He lighted some candles outside our house for them.

December 25, 2009

Marlon was too excited to call papa Boy on the cell phone to confirm their coming to visit him here at Bulacan. Because ate Mimi and papa Boy have planned to spent Christmas with us here in Bulacan. It was an overnight stay and have December 26 as the set date for reunion with the rest of their cousins Third and Maribel.

But Marlon's spirit went low upon hearing that they're not able to come because they're all busy. They told Marlon to make up on his birthday on December 29. Marlon was very sad after their phone conversation.

I just comforted him with these words, "Dadi ok lang yun. At least ngayon alam na natin na marami ng pagbabago sa iyo. Unti unti ka ng lumalakas at gumagaling."

December 28, 2009

He called ate Mimi and asked if they will come visit him tomorrow on his birthday. But he was just upset to hear that they're busy.

December 29, 2009

Today is his 38th birthday. I cooked organic pasta for his birthday. I made him an organic salad, tacos, garden fresh salad and Bulalo (his favorite). But he was not happy. His spirit was low. No amount of encouraging words could cheer him up. He was thinking a lot lately. He refused to take his medicines, he's no longer opening his sari sari store, he refused to go outside, he frequently lie down and refused to eat well. I was too worried about his condition at this time. I could feel his PAIN. But this time, not the PAIN of his illness. But the PAIN in his heart that is more PAINFUL than his cancer.

I wanted to scream. I wanted so much to show my anger at them. Why can't they just spend time with Marlon? Why would they give him an excuse that they're busy? Can't they just pause for a while and think about Marlon who is sick of cancer? Can't they just leave their things for a moment and spend time with Marlon who needs EXTRA CARE and ATTENTION? Can't they just simply think about Marlon for a moment? Agh! It hurts! It's much painful for Marlon seeing that my family is taking good care of him MORE than his own family.

His composure just got back when my brother Rowell with Josie and Miko, cousins Ann and Jerson visited him. He was touched when my brother Rowell came over and cooked Bulalo for him.

December 30, 2009

Though Marlon knew that Me and my Family will always be there for him, he can't hide his longing to have his family looking after him the way we showed him. He wants to feel the warmth. Some physical touch and connection with him. Money can't replace LOVE and CARE. No amount of material nor money can replace the touch of love and genuine care.

January 18, 2010

Marlon's energy is deteriorating but Marlon's tummy is showing improvements. His tummy is no longer inflamed. He's no longer experiencing pain. His colostomy is no longer inflamed.

Marlon was depressed about his family. He's become silent most of the time. And I make sure that I talked to him once in a while. Telling him stories about work and God's blessings in our lives. I kept on hugging him and never failed to kiss him when I'm leaving for work. I assured him of my love for him and will always be with him.

His left leg was inflamed I don't know why. I called Doc Des and set an appointment on Thursday at 10am.

Though Marlon was refusing to take his Balancing meds, I was able to convince him to take it anyway before I left for work.

January 19, 2010

OM Don Lim caught me asleep during the call for 15 minutes. I was expecting for an IR at the end of the day. But he didn't approached me again and never had one.

Yasmine my office mate prayed for me and for Marlon before I left the office.

When I arrived home Marlon's colostomy is very small (at a normal size). This is another sign that his cancer cells are now asleep. Dadi was able to finish 1 whole duck's egg raw mixed with whey powder.

Dadi told me that he can hardly swallow, talk and eat. I was beginning to worry again about his situation. I could see that he's losing weight so fast.

Dadi also cried and was very sad about what Mimi told him. He said Mimi asked him to wear diapers because he is disturbing their sleep at night every time he asked to go to the comfort room. He then asked me to buy him some diapers. Since then on refused to move and stayed long hours lying down in bed. He doesn't want to go to the comfort room anymore. He'd rather do his thing lying down. Besides he's got his diapers on anyway. That's how he thinks these days.

January 21, 2010

Marlon attended the check up session with Doc Des. Ate Mimi drove us to Doc Navarro's clinic. Kuya Jun accompanied us. Ate Mimi just got her new Honda City car. Doc Des said that he's dehydrated and needs to be confined. Due to his refusal to eat, his energy level dropped. Doc Des advised to give Marlon the Balancing all the more. So there's a need to get Marlon's 2week supply of Balancing which is normally costs P6000.

At this time, ate Mimi knew that I don't have money anymore. We were on our own in Bulacan and we don't have any financial aid there at all. We're just expecting my salary to feed us, for Marlon and for Marsie's school.

When Doc Des said that his food and meds worth P6000, I asked ate Mimi if she can lend us some money. She plainly answered, "NO I have no money". So, what's next? What do we do now? I only have P2000 left in my pocket for Marlon's colostomy. Should we go home and leave Marlon's meds and food because we have nothing to pay for it? I can't stand this damn creepy selfishness in the air. So I talked to Doc Des in private. I told the whole story in a gist. That she just bought that 5day old Honda City car in COLD CASH. And that she has no MONEY. And that I only have P2000 left in my pocket (no more no less - my last grin so to speak). I am willing to shell out my P2000. I asked Doc Des if she could cut down the meds for just a week and I'll get back to get the remaining set. Doc Des can't believe of what she heard that Marlon's very own sister doesn't have the initiative to do something about Marlon's needs. She was just seated at the lounge with no reactions at all. I could still remember the words of Doc Des, "May bago siyang kotse pero hindi niya maisip mag withdraw. Madaming ATM diyan sa labas ah. May ATM ba siya? Tanong mo nga kung may ATM siya." So I went to ask ate Mimi if she brought her ATM to withdraw something for Marlon. Again, she just answered me in point-blank "NO". Doc Des again said these words, "Ah alam ko na kung bakit nagkaganyan si Marlon. Made-depress ka talga sa ganyang klaseng tao. Sige Susie bigay ko na lang sa iyo ng P2000 balikan mo na lang yung kulang. Tulong ko yan kay Marlon. Sige na alagaan mo na lang mabuti si Marlon." I thanked Doc Des and we left the clinic.

Ate Mimi discussed things with papa that we will have a private room for Marlon at St. Victoria Hospital.

I have work at night and I think I should stay with Marlon at the hospital. I texted TL Jules to get OM Dom's number. I need to avail a Vacation Leave. TL Jules texted me back stating that OM Don Lim can't approve of my VL because there was no available slot.

After few minutes, OM Dom of Asia texted me that he's giving me Friday and Saturday VL. Thank God for OM Dom. He's not really my immediate superior but God used him to grant my VL. Sunday is my scheduled off so I'll be back Monday then.

I texted Tita Glends to burn Marlon's favorites songs: Still, Isang Bagay and Dampi ng Kalwalhatian. I believe that Marlon is showing signs that he's letting go but I'm not ready to LET GO. I asked tita to bring Marsie at St. Victoria to give give his dad some strength to go on if there's still hope left.

January 22, 2010

Marlon was transferred to a Private Room in St. Victoria (room 205). Prior to that I told Mimi that it's ok for me if Marlon is going to be confined at the Surgical Ward. But she keeps on insisting at the Nurse Station if there's a private room available then we better bring Marlon to a much better room. Kuya Orly was with us along the way. He know how our conversation goes. It was clear that we will get a better place for Marlon even if a Surgical Ward is fine with us. I informed papa Boy about this and he said that it is far better to give Marlon a better room to stay.

Ate Mimi was asking Papa Boy to have Marlon take his Viaticum. When I heard of this, I want to jumped off my seat and walked out. Why? Because it feels like, she's thinking ahead that Marlon will die any moment this day. YES, I agreed that we need to face all possibilities even the worst and detrimental things may happen. But not this soon LORD please.

Tita Glendz, Jas and Marsie arrived at St. Victoria to visit dadi Marlon. Papa Boy thought that Marsie is going to stay at Marikina. I told her that Marsie has to go to school and that her studies should not be affected of any situation that may cause trauma to our daughter.

Marsie talked to her dad and she asked dadi Marlon to eat. Dadi smiled and he tried to eat. He was able to eat some sinigang na bangus and red rice.

Tita Glendz told me that Marsie's behavior changed. Marsie was gazing at something and somewhat at a state of shock.

Marsie asked me, "Mommy bakit maliit braso ni daddy?" I answered, "Kase hindi siya kumakain nang maayos kaya pumapayat siya. Kaya ikaw dapat kumain ka nang maayos para maging healthy ka." Then she looked are her dad and said, "Kase dadi kumain ka na."

Tita Glendz talked to dadi Marlon. She assured dadi Marlon that each and everyone of us will take turn in taking good care of him. And that he's going to stay with them at their house and not at our house so that even the kids (Jas, Sarah and Marsie) could take good care of him all the time. Papa and Mama will also take good care of him.

Dadi Marlon tried to talk even though he's got a hard time to speak. He thanked tita Glendz and went back to sleep.

January 24, 2010

Marlon was out of the hospital. During his stay at the hospital, I was able to administer his balancing instead of the medicines prescribed by Doctor Cruz (Regeron and Heracline Forte).

Marlon requested to bring him in Bulacan at my brother's house right after he was discharged from St. Victoria.

Ate Mimi and Papa Boy took us back home in Bulacan using the Honda City. Ate Mimi drove the car. On our way home, Marlon was very impatient and keeps on pounding the car every stops we've made.

As we arrived at Junix' house, he smiled at my brother and at tita Glendz and requested to lie down to take a rest. His sofa bed was all set and he was happy to be back home.

Papa Boy and Ate Mimi bade us goodbye and asked me and my family to take care of Marlon. Ate Mimi handed me P100 for Marlon's needs. I thanked her then they left.

Marlon's NEW LIFE has begun when he went back home in Bulacan. Everyone of us were involed to take good care of him. Papa used to watch over him at night while I'm at work. Mama was the one looking after his food and medicines. Tita Glendz took her turn to watch over him when mama is doing something. Junix was in charged to play Christian music over and over again to enlighten Dadi's spirit. I used to change Marlon's diaper and making him comfortable everyday. I make sure that his food are available for mama and tita glendz to serve him when I'm away. I talked to him all the more. We prayed together all the more during these days. I read the Bible to him and assured of God's love for him. I even opened SALVATION once again and that assured him that God is going to take good care of everything for all of us. I kept on telling him that I love him so much.

January 31, 2010

Today is my day off and this is my last night with Marlon that he was still alive. I could still remember I was so tired at that time. I wasn't able to sleep because Marlon was very hard head-head and having some tantrums. He asked for cold water most of the time at 30 minutes interval. He asked for Vita Plus and it should be cold. He was able to eat but after one bite he would refuse to eat for the 2nd bite. He just want to drink and drink a lot of cold water. He was talkative and restless. While he was sleeping, I lied down next to him. When he woke up, he fell off and landed on top of me. He was too heavy and I asked Junix to help me.

He asked for toothbrush and toothpaste. I helped him and complemented him that he looks good and smells like a baby. He smiled and laughed. After a while he asked again for a toothbrush and a toothpaste at 3am. He kept on asking for toothbrush and toothpaste over and over again until 7am. He was looking for his papa Boy and ate Mimi. My papa told him that they are in Marikina. He asked me to clean his face. He picked his nose and cleaned his hands. He kept on kissing me and saying "I love you" a lot of times. He was telling happy stories that happened in the past.

February 1, 2010

I hate to leave Marlon in that state but I have to be strong and go back to work the normal way as it used to be.

February 2, 2010

7:00am - Mama assisted Dadi to eat. He was able to finish a slice of papaya without struggling. Papa helped dadi to drink milk and water but he's no longer responding.

8:00am - I arrived home from work. I talked to him, hugged him and uttered "I love you" to his ears. I told him that I'm going to give him his favorite juice which is Vita Plus. He was able to drink half of his lock and lock jug.

8:30am - He's no longer asking for water. He keeps on sleeping and not talking. His reflexes and movements are limited. Normally he would ask for water at 10 minute interval but this time he's not.

10:00am - Still he's not able to drink water. I asked mama to prepare him beef liver soup, water with honey and milk. I asked Junix to buy a medicine dropper just to let him take a drink. But as I put on the dropper to his mouth, dadi was just biting it. When I force to put on the milk on his mouth using the dropper, it would just worsen the case. He was choking when I did that so I stopped. I just talked to him and prayed with him. I hugged him several times, kissed him and kept on telling him that we all love him.

I asked Junix to accompany me to look for a doctor who would administer NGT to dadi so that he could eat. I informed dadi Marlon about my plan to look for a doctor for his NGT. His faced turned stiff showing that he disliked the idea. But still, Junix and I went ahead to look for a doctor. Unfortunately, Junix and were not successful in finding one. We just went back home and I prayed in my heart to give me peace and wisdom on how to handle this situation.

Junix and I went back home. Dadi pas peacefully sleeping so I just took a short nap. I was holding his hand while I took the short nap. When I woke up, I saw he was holding his wedding ring on his right hand. I changed his diaper.

I asked dadi if he wants me to sing his favorite song. He just nodded his head slightly so I sang "Isang Bagay". The lyrics goes like this...

"Isang bagay ang hinihiling sa Panginoon. Ito ang hinahanap... Ito ang ninanais, na ako ay manirahan sa kanyang kaharian sa lahat ng araw ng aking buhay upang masdan and kagandahan ng panginoon at hanapin siya sa templo niyang banal"

Junix sang it with me. After awhile it was only me singing because Junix can't help it, he cried. I sang the song again softly in his ears - teary eyed. I knew that it's his time NOW to be with the Lord. I kept on reminding him about his Salvation. That he need not to be afraid. God is waiting for him in HEAVEN.

11:00am - Still dadi was not asking for water or anything.... Still I kept on trying to give him a drink though I knew that it's gonna be useless.

12:00pm - Took a quick lunch and went back beside dadi.. talking with him... praying with him.

1:00pm - Junix and I tried to check at the lying in for a dotor for dadi's NGT. Still no doctor available. We went back to Las Palmas and asked for Mang Neri son who is a nurse. But he was not around either.

2:00pm - Marlon's eyes keeps on dropping some tears. Kept on telling him that we all love him. Marsie and I loves him so much that I'm proud of him. I told him that he's the bravest person I've ever met. He was brave enough to face his battle and that he's man enough to face his Creator.

2:15pm - His eyes started to cloud. I texted kuya Third immediately that Marlon could leave anytime now.

2:20pm - Kuya Third called me up and just had a brief talk with him. I asked him to let papa Boy and ate Mimi know about Marlon's condition.

2:24pm - Papa called me outside while talking with kuya Third. He said the moment I turned back to answer Third's call, Marlon took a deep breath and never took another one. Papa said he just waited if dadi will take his 2nd breath but he didn't that's why he called my attention.

Marlon's time has come to be with the Lord. Even up to his last breath he always wants to see I'm ok. He didn't want me to see that he's leaving. He left peacefully. He wanted to make sure that I'll be ok when he's gone. I cried as I checked on his pulse, his heartbeat and his breath. His eyes was clouded but half opened. So i have to close his eyes and close his mouth while his body is till soft. Junix helped me in tying his his head with a hanky to lock his jaw. I was crying but I was at peace for I knew that he left in GOD's perfect time.

3:00pm - I have to compose myself and face the next step. Junix and I went to Immaculate Conception Funeral Home. By faith, I reserved the funeral service worth P19,000. Tita Glendz helped me to contact an agent of AMMAN Park for Marlon's interment. Again by faith, I reserved a lawn for dadi worth P16,000. I took all these responsibilities by faith.

3:30pm - The Immaculate Conception Funeral Service to take dadi's corpse. It was very timely because Marsie just arrived from school. She saw that her dad was lifeless and was taken by the funeral service out of the house. Marsie was crying. She knew that her dad was gone. I rushed back inside to give Marsie a hug. I explained to her that dadi has gone with the Lord already to become an angel to watch over us.

5:00pm - Marlon's corpse was brought back at Junix's houese where Marlon's wake will be held for one week. Marsie can't look at her dad's corpse. She was crying most of the time. She was at the state of shock as everybody else was.

February 3, 2010

Papa Boy and ate Mimi came. I told them what happened from the time they left us until his very last breath. Ate Mimi and Papa Boy were crying so loud. Mammoth and Daye were crying too. Papa Boy that he will take care of the Funeral Service Fee and ate Mimi will take care of the Interment.

My team mates Palauns and other Aussie agents came too: AA, Mae, Cali, Mavic, mami Ruby, Ad, Garro, Joyce, Bernz&Gamz, Sarah (Bernz' sis)

February 4, 2010

Marlon's relative came: Angge, Tito Manolo, Lily, etc. Emerald boys came too. Algerian came as well: TL Aris, Sam, Andie, AA with Jowa

When Marlon's relatives arrived I was very upset hearing Angge saying on my back that I didn't took care of Marlon's Funeral. Her words are "Bakit naman ganito pinabayaan lang and libing?"

I've heard a lot and have endured all these. I want to pay Marlon some respect. And I need not to defend myself because I knew very well deep down in my heart that MARLON has seen everything in HEAVEN. I know that Marlon knew EVERY motives of everyone who's visiting his wake.

February 5, 2010

Seychelles came: (TL Nes, Apple, Ella, Che, Hannah, Iris, Liz) as well as Jijie, Myk, Avie with her famiiy, Edd Gloria, Gian and Paulo, Maryann Wong with her special someone.

February 6, 2010

Early this morning more guests were coming. Team of TL Noli came: Gelu, Vanie, CM, Gretz, Mau, Abee, Ole and Denese.

Mañanita for Marlon was held. It was organized by papa Boy together with the rest of Kursilyo Brothers and Sisters. This is the very day that the LORD has made. And this is the very day that all of our prayers has been answered.

First, God has healed his cancer during his last days. And now he's gone with the Lord and his cancer vanished. Secondly, this is the day when God is going to mend broken relationships amongst us. No matter how painful it has caused me, I still need to forgive and love them anyway.

The Lord has answered our prayers to fulfill his purpose in saving more souls and to display God's greater glory. Bro. Alex was the one who officiated Marlon's Funeral Service. God was very good and his power has no limit. Initially, papa Boy wanted to held Mañanita first before Bro. Alex would officiate Marlon's funeral service. But it turned out to be Bro. Alex was allowed to speak first before they hold their Mañanita. It was a good movement of the holy spirit to prepare the hearts of people who were present. There were about 100 of them who heard of God's message of salvation, love and forgiveness. Then right after the service of Bro. Alex, more souls were awakened on how fortunate Marlon was to be assured of his salvation.

This is also the day God manifested that he is indeed our Jehovah Jireh. The Lord hsa blessed us and has provided every single needs we have from the smallest detail to the more complex ones.

My family was shaken too by their comments and negative point of view. My brother's patience was tested to deal with Mang Mar. And I was able to see how Pekto has changed. I was able to talk with Pekto and he said that he loves Marlon so much.

Ate Gigi and Jigz came also to show their support to my family. My relatives from Fairview came over as well. They have got to share their own stories on how Marlon's friends and families acted and treated the wake. But it doesn't matter anymore because Marlon is now happy with the Lord.

Whatever ill-feelings I've had in the past has been dealt already. I've learned to hold back my anger and have learned eventually to LOVE them anyway because I believe this is how Marlon wanted it to be.

As I kept on sharing with my friends that I was born for Marlon to take care of him and to love him. And that he was born to make me strong.

I wrote this journal for the purpose of documenting incidents how it happened. I don't mean to hurt anyone. Anything mentioned that could probably hurt anybody was not intentionally meant. I was just being me thinking out loud and expressing my emotions during that time. But has transpired in the past. I'm looking forward now praying and hoping that his journal of Dadi Marlon's Journey to Eternity may serve an inspiration on how he bravely fought his battle and how God has orchestrated everything with a purpose to mend broken relationships.

Palauans came back: TL Aris, JC and Mae.

CGC brethren came too: Haydon, Anna, Estrella, Bong, etc. Thank you for all your prayers, support and love gift.

February 9, 2010

At the Interment (AMMAN Park)

Ad and Sam Tamayo came... My brother's neighbor brought his 10 pigeons at Amman Park and he freed all of them during Marlon's Last Memorial Service that was officiated by Bro. Alex... Thanks to Engr. Cortez who voluntarily lend his bus to accommodate gueest in going to Amman. Thanks to all Marlon's friends who came. Thanks to our neighbors who comforted me when I was unceasingly crying all throughout the Memorial Service. Thanks to all familiy, friends and relatives who came but was not mentioned in this Journal. Thanks to Tanada Family that I have LOVED just as how I loved my husband.

After the Interment, we were all silent as we came back home. The kids were exhausted and they can also feel the sadness in the atmosphere. Sarah who is only 3 years old can simply understand that his Tito Marlon is now her angel to watch over her. Jasmine, who called his Tito Marlon as hi PRINCE. And Marsie, would always remember him as her DAD.

Being me who does not put things in a box noticed how everyone was exhausted. I thought of asking my brothers if they want to go somewhere else to unwind. The kids heard me, my cousins heard me, everybody present in the house heard me asking that question. They were shocked! Silence enveloped the place. Marsie cracked the silence and she said she wants to go out swimming. Then everybody agreed to that idea. In just a matter of 30 minutes we were all ready to pack our things to unwind. We all went to Sitio Lucia.

It was a very sentimental day for me because, Marlon and I have planned to spend summer 2010 at Sitio Lucia because he wanted to see his idol/crush Izzy of Sexbomb. Tears came rolling my eyes. Josie and I went to the cafetorium to buy some chips. It made me cry all the more upon seeing Izzy together with the cast of Daisy Siete inside the cafetorium. I looked at her. I smiled at her and she smiled back.

As everybody was having fun, we all can't help it but pause some short silence as we all remember Marlon. Our conversations were full of his memories. Ate Maribel and her daughter shared their moments with Marlon. My brothers has got so many things to say about him. Even the kids have joined us and shared their moments with their tito. Marsie shared her bonding moments with Dadi.

THE END